Perspective: It comes with time and Mentors
I’m competitive, there is no doubt about it. From dirty slide tackles in 1st-grade soccer to competing at the highest levels of amateur golf in New England, and now in the professional world, the competitive fire burns bright. My fault lies in controlling that fire, utilizing it as fuel and not burning the house down internally.
Being aware of its presence is the first step. Often, I claim self-awareness to be my strength, humility, on the other hand, has been a work in progress.
In “The Obstacle is the Way” by Ryan Holiday, his take on perspective is how you handle situations: objectivity, or subjectively:
“It’s your choice whether you want to put I in front of something (I hate public speaking. I screwed up. I am harmed by this). This adds an extra element: you in relation to the obstacle, rather than just the obstacle itself. And with the wrong perspective, we become consumed and overwhelmed with something that is actually quite small. So why subject ourselves to that?”
There are times I made myself miserable due to circumstances that lay beyond my control. I reacted in a subjective manner, as opposed to zooming out on the big picture. The mentors I have surrounded myself with have shown me the way to handle those difficult times, which brings me to…
How do you handle: Pressure? Failure? Competition? Success?
In a perfect world, the answers to those questions would be: with a clear head, grace, drive and, finally, humility.
I’m not there yet, but I strive to reach that place.
Defining the problem is the first step in solving it. I’m glad you started reading Holiday’s book. I got a lot out of it.